原来我在意

今天才发现...
原来我在意...
那封这一辈子也不可能再收到的信息...

沉重的心情...
一句无心插柳的问题...
让我眼泪不争气...
在眼眶打圈...

原来我在意...

Give up

I don’t know what does the pain means…
It was a song…just a song…
And it wasn’t the song we heard together…
But I still tears when I was singing it…
I know I miss you…

I know it shouldn’t be in such a way…
to missed about you…
Don’t worry…
All of the things I recall…
was those happy memory…
That’s the way I missed you now…

You know...This is the thing that I don't really wanna admit...
But too bad it's feel too real...
I know I fall into someone…
The feeling…was just because I’m too lonely…
And I know…This wasn’t the thing that I should involve myself in…
Sometimes I told myself that…what’s the point to let go it so easy?
I always wanna get what I want…and I’ll work hard after it…
But I don’t think so now is the proper moment…

I’m now shouting here…
This wasn’t the thing I should do right now…
I’m going to give up…forget it and get myself off from everything about that…
No more the someone…no more no more and no more…

Let’s put my hard work on my study…my dreams…and my future…
I swear I’ll let go it this time
I swear I won't screw it up tis time...

And about the accident…
Don’t worry…I’m fine ^^

Actually I wanna talk a lot…
but…don’t know why…
I like to talk about those stupid thing…

Reality…
I surrender…

And the song that made me missed about you was...

只说给你听

Reality

There are a lot of situation happen around me…

The very first time I learnt to live my life against reality…
Learn not to fight to hard against reality…
And I learn how to bow my stubborn thought to reality…
Compromise with reality…

I did have a job right now…
And I didn’t really like it…
But when it is the only job I can work for right now…
What else can I do after it?

I do not have the ability to change a new job right now…
Those other job might be more interesting….
But what if the pay wasn’t as much as the job I’m working for right now…
And when you really need a job for all the living expenses…
What else I can do?

Say NO to my mind…
" NO, You have no choice!”

And that’s the end…

I’m going to give a tough try…
To like this boring job…

The very first time…
I learnt not to be childish anymore…

I used to become the girl…
When I don’t like the job…I might chance it…
I do have time and chance…
but in this country…
I seriously do not have a lot of choices…

Because I’m foreigner…

P/S : Hey my fashion sweeties…
Good Luck in your webshop… ^^

Dream

A dream that too far away from you could achieve…
Would you just give up that easy?
Would you just let the opportunity passed by?

I’m no longer waiting for the next opportunity…
I want it…And I’ll not give up without a tough try…

Dream whatever when you are still young and work hard after it…
Or else you will live a life of regretting why I’m not doing my favourite job when you grow up…

I need Air-condition

I’m so sorry for not updating my blog…
Life’s here was seriously busy…
My day was fulfil by study work and sleep…
Don’t even have any free  time for drama and my Twilight…
Too bad… X.X

I miss my besties in Malaysia so much…
I really hope that I could be the one in their 21st Birthday Party…
Their outing…and Movie with you all…

Life’s go on…
The day I chose to be here…I should realize that I got to miss you all a lot…
And time passed by seriously fast…
I have been in Japan for 3 months…

I don’t even know that I could feel the loneliness so deeply in this country…
Maybe lack of besties and my family around me…
It wasn’t a proper moment to fall into someone…
And I did fall into…What should I do….
Better keep myself away from those unexpected things that could mess me up once again…

Lovely…first time that I don’t really have idea what should I do… =D
Not even 1…
And this is the most stupid thing that I had ever did in this new country…
fall into someone… zzZZzzzZZZZzzzz…

Summer is coming around…
The weather is going to be extremely hot…
And I need Air-condition!!!

Keep Trying =)

Much more better feeling compare to last 2 weeks…
Maybe the negative emotion was some how cause by the sick that suffer me for almost 3 weeks…
Cough for 3 weeks…Killing me…My throat was so painful…
And the most important thing was I can’t even sing… >_<

I used to too PRINCESS at home…
My mom take care of me a lot when I was sick…
And I got well soon very fast because I do have mom who took care on my food…
Seriously, I do not have anyone who do this for me… =(
I miss my mom dishes so much…
Not only when I’m sick…
When I have no idea what to eat today…
When I wish to eat something so much but I do not how to cook it…
When I was too busy till I do not have enough time to cook something good for myself…

Life here was too real…
Too realistic…
There’s no more drama in my life…
No more TV programme…
No more any free time for Twilight…
No more time for comic…
No more movie time with friends…

I used to have a lot free time for my favourite activities…
Too bad I do have very limited time now…
I can only manage them with priority…
And the most important thing was the study right now….
And what…I always arrange outing before I got my time for study… XD

I was freaking boring with the life without fashion magazine…
Without my Hollywood Fashion Icon, Vogue magazine and even Newspaper…
Life’s changed…a lot…
I was still me…but the lifestyle was like someone else I do not recognize…

Maybe that’s why I was so suffer for last two weeks…
I’m feeling better now…
Since chatting with my besties via msn…
Since I received my besties message…
Since a blog post of my best friend…

“What makes you different from others is the effort that you're putting on and the spirit that you're holding on.” dedicated to LiLing <3

Seems like I did forgot the reason why I’m here…
And I got to pick up it back…
No matter how hard it will be…
We just got to keep trying…

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse is going on screen on 30th June <3
I’m so excited now ^^

May god blessed me

More and more depressing…

I doubt myself sometimes whether did I make the right choice?
Seem like runaway to another place else didn’t cure…
I’m still me…

I’m so sorry I didn’t meant to be so emo…
I was giving out a lot…
And ending always disappointed me…

Should I doubt myself that I seriously not good in socialize?
I probably not having any social skill…
Sometimes feel like I’m abandoned…
Especially in the country where I do not have people to talk with…
The social circle was too limited…
And when I did told something…Everyone would know….

I was so disappointed…extremely…
But I couldn’t tell any story here…

Tears are running out from my tear glance…

This is the place where I wish so much to be in…
It' should not feel this way…
Something went wrong…and again…

You know...
Girls always think a lot...
Haiz...no choice... >_<

MaMa… I miss you so much…
and all my lovely friends in Msia…
I know that you all are forever there for me =)

May god blessed me…